Garnet Rubio’s Coming Out Story

I am fortunate to be able to say this story is mine. I had struggled with my gender identity my entire life. I remember looking in the mirror when I was 5 years old with absolute disgust. Can you imagine that? While all the other boys were outside playing, I was inside crying over how much I was bullied.

I remember when I was a teenager, my parents made several attempts to get me to “come out of the closet” as a gay man. I refused to acknowledge who I was because I hated who I was. I allowed myself to believe that what bullies told me was true, and that I was an abomination. My coming out story is actually quite the opposite from most. It was my parents begging me to be true to myself and be okay with who I am, and me crying and screaming at them. Isn’t that something?

When I was finally ready, my family welcomed me with open arms. But it wasn’t enough! For another 4 years, I continued to struggle with who I was. I hated my face, my body – everything that comprised who I was. I had no idea why. I had a supportive family and had just moved to the city of my dreams, New York City.

“that was what I had been running from my entire life”

One day, I sat down and went through several options to make myself happier. Then I just realized: “My body is not right. I am a woman.” And then it clicked. I mentally felt the most massive weight lifted off my shoulders. I knew immediately then that, that was what I had been running from my entire life.

I texted my mother & grandmother and told them I needed to speak to both of them on a group call. I told them I had decided to go on hormones and transition completely… They were like “lol k. we know.” THAT WAS IT. They just told me to be sure that was the decision I wanted to make, and that they loved me. THAT. WAS. IT.

I proceeded to spend years completely transitioning physically and legally with the full support of my family and friends. My mother, who is a nurse, flew into New York from Texas twice to take care of me as I recovered from surgery. The bond that I have with my family is beyond strong, and I am so grateful to have had their love throughout this entire journey.

“It is not as hard as it sounds if there is love and acceptance from your family”

If there is anything I could say to parents having difficulty coming to terms with their child’s new gender identity, I would say this: it is your child. What is your other option? Conquer your ignorance. My parents actually found it very difficult to answer this question when I asked them. Be thoughtful that their gender identity may take precedence over their adult identity. Give them time to settle into themselves, and simply practice love for them. It is not as hard as it sounds if there is love and acceptance from your family.

Coming out stories