My name is Rebecca, I’m now a 23 year old confident, fully out of the closet lesbian. Or just a regular girl living in the UK with their girlfriend by the sea. My coming out story is a very simple one in its tale of events but unveiled far more depth and understanding of my personality in its process.

From as far young as I can remember living in a small town in France. Going to school, all my friends were girls and I always had a boyfriend. This was perfectly comfortable to me and I didn’t act out or play differently to how I felt. I remember my first kiss with a boy I was so excited, I couldn’t believe he finally kissed me. A boy kissed me and I liked it.

I’m 10 and a new girl started school, I thought she was cool and wanted her to like me and us be friends. So amongst the questions, I asked her, do you like Avril Lavigne? how come you moved? etc. I asked her if she had ever had a girlfriend, why did I ask? And where did that question ever come from??

This concept had never crossed my mind but all of a sudden I was excited she might say yes, and she did! I think it was a lie, something to be cool, but now I wanted to know MORE. Nothing ever came from this and we continued on as normal young friends.

“I desperately wanted to meet gay girls by this point.”

Another new girl came and she asked me to be her girlfriend. Again, excited with a flutter in my stomach, I said yes. Once teased a couple times by the boys I burst out crying in school and said I wasn’t a lesbian and it was a joke and the new girl apologized to me publicly and we moved on.

Still.. there was that girl twinkle again. Quickly dismissed, nothing around me opened me up to this gay idea so I never paid more attention to it. I kissed my girl friends to practice for the boys a couple of times, I usually found this quite funny and jokingly kept trying to get a few more kisses.

Then it really started, when I moved back to England to start a new school in year 9 (13 yrs) one of the first things on my mind was if there were any lesbians. By this point, I loved watching the lesbian couple on the TV show Buffy the Vampire, something was up. I desperately wanted to meet gay girls by this point. I think my head knew what was going on and if not it wanted to figure it out, without it being labelled, without it being anything. I liked girls.

I made friends with the lesbians straight away. 3 months in it went from straight to being asked, slightly teased and questioned about if I had a girlfriend or was I a lesbian to yeah, I guess so, maybe, sure I’m bi. Maybe everything I’ve ever thought makes sense now and these people are like me.

Around me now I have pansexual and lesbian friends and a popular flamboyant gay boy around the corridors. The exposure came all at once, suddenly and I was ready for it. I just accepted it, It was my new path, it was the me I had always been. I had answers to my never asked questions.

And now this is my life. I go to pride every year and support and understand all the LGBT issues in the world, I have complete passion and understanding for everyone under the queer umbrella. Simple, liking girls is a simple act. Just like when I liked boys. If you feel like you like girls or you like boys, you like them. Just accept it. Its a feeling, feelings are to be felt and to be felt true.

“Sometimes I’m feminine, sometimes more masculine, that doesn’t define my sexual orientation or my branding”

I’ve had a lot of thoughts to my self on what else I could have been, other incidents that occurred that could lead me to think I was trans or gender queer. But at the end of the day, I’m me and that’s all it is. I’m in a girls body, I don’t mind that, the desire for no boobs is still strong but that doesn’t mean I want to be a boy. Sometimes I’m feminine, sometimes more masculine, that doesn’t define my sexual orientation or my branding. I’m just me and you should be too. Wear clothing, not gendered clothing, see colours and moods for what they are, not a gender or sexuality. Be free.

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