There’s been multiple occasions where we’ve been out specifically in a club together and approached by straight men, offering to buy us drinks or just chatting with us. I specifically remember one time being approached by a guy asking if I was in a relationship, when I replied saying that I had a girlfriend he immediately stated that he didn’t believe me.

I told him that Imogen was actually there with me that night but in another room, he then told me to find her to ‘prove’ that she was my girlfriend. He asked if I had any pictures of us kissing which I was so grossed out by, and persisted by telling me that I didn’t look like a lesbian and he wouldn’t believe me… not that I had to prove myself to him anyways.

I was only 18 then and unfortunately this was just the beginning of experiences like this, where me and my relationship is sexualised by men. We’ve both experienced multiple times men telling us that we didn’t look gay enough or like a couple, and had intrusive questions and comments about our relationship from men we had just met.

As queer women, unfortunately we’re very used to this, our relationship is sexualised or dismissed – and sometimes both. If we put up a fight against this sexualisation from men, we are then told that our identity is not valid, simply because it does not exist for mens pleasure.