Relationships, we all want them. But, when we get one does it matter who it’s with? This is the question that is bugging us right now… So you guessed it. We’re going to look at LGBTQ+ relationships VS Straight relationships.
Dun, Dun, Dunnn.
You may be thinking there is no difference & you’d be right…. to a degree. You see, every relationship is different. No matter who you are with, you are going experience different things. So we can’t label LGBTQ+ or straight relationships with any stereotypes.
But what we can do is look at the differences, if there are any & try to understand why one type of relationship is accepted more than others.
Commonly known as the ‘norm’ in today’s society – these relationships are between men & women and are seen throughout society.
I feel a bit silly describing these relationships but stay with me. It’s going to make sense… soon.
When you are growing up, you’re always asked if you have a relationship with the opposite sex. I guess it’s expected of us all to get into these type of relationships? Throughout history, these relationships have dominated the dating scene. Marriage, families & so on have commonly been formed from straight relationships. So, our family & friends expect us to fit into this normality as it’s accepted within society.
I’m using LGBTQ+ relationships as same-sex relationships aren’t the only type within the community. These relationships can be between any two human beings in love, no matter their gender.
They’re no different to straight relationships in the sense that these two people are in total awe of each other & want to get married, start a family… you know, the normal things you want to do whilst being with someone you love.
To help us get a better overview of LGBTQ+ relationships, we’ve asked some lovely couples 4 questions:
- Where did you meet
- How long have you been together
- What’s the best thing about your partner
- Have you faced any discrimination against your relationship – Keep this in mind.
“We met through snapchat, she saw me on her friends’ phone and asked for my username. We snapped back and forth a few times and then I asked her on a date to the cinema when we instantly clicked and made it official.
We’ve been together since September 20th, 2017, so about three and a half months. So far, we haven’t faced any direct discrimination and for that, we are thankful as we know so many LGBTQ+ couples face severe abuse and discrimination on a daily basis.
As for the best thing about her? I can’t choose. Between her cute, boopable nose, the way her hands lace together with mine, her adorable personality, or the way she completely nerds out when talking about her favourite video games or books, it’s impossible to decide which I love the most.”
“I met him about two years ago, we had gone to the same school and became good friends quickly. Fast-forward a few years and now we’ve been in a diamoric relationship for almost a year now. The first few months were very rocky for me, I was struggling with my identity and trying out different names without him knowing. I was very afraid to come out to him as a transmasculine agender because he had told me he was questioning his bisexuality and thought he may have been straight all along.
But I did, and it was the best thing ever. He was completely open to the gender spectrum and new identities. He allowed me to teach him and he’s proud to identify as omnisexual. Living in Mississippi, we face so much discrimination from both strangers and friends alike. From people calling us slurs to everyone questioning me about gender, but it’s never fazed us.
The best thing about him is that he’s the first serious relationship where gender roles were never needed. He looks great in flashy dresses and suits with trenchcoats. He’s confident in how he expresses himself every day, even in a school that still forces men and women into specific clothes. That’s always been my favorite part about him.”
“I met my now fiancée on twitter in 2015, whilst I was in another relationship. We lost touch because of this. However, a year later in July 2016, we started talking again and have spoken every single day since. We have now been together for 1 year, 3 months and 6 days ?
We have received discrimination against our relationship, the biggest from my mother who doesn’t accept our relationship, which has caused a lot of fights in my relationship and caused me to move out. Mine and my mothers’ relationship is still awful, I don’t see that ever changing.
The best thing about my partner is her sense of humour. Most definitely. Hands down, can always, always make me laugh so hard I’m crying and/or holding my stomach bc it hurts ?”
“We met through the army recruitment to join cadets but the way we started talking was that she randomly gave me her phone to put my number in even though we had never spoken before. We have been together for a year and two months although I admit I took so long to make it official.
In our relationship, we have had to deal with her homophobic parents. They don’t want us together. They’ve threatened to kick her out, not come to our wedding and not support her because we are two girls together.
The best thing about my girlfriend is that no matter what she stays by my side. Even if sometimes I’m in the worst mood she will message me through it to make sure I’m okay.”
“We met online and texted for about a month before we met in real life. Our first date was three weeks ago and we met over and over again since then. We are still dating and not counting it as a relationship yet.
So far we have had no problems with discrimination, I mean we get stared at when we are holding hands but our friends and my family as well are very supportive.
The best thing about him is that I can be absolutely honest and he understands when I am not able to be that much of a “cutie, yes I like you and shitting rainbows while riding a unicorn”. He is literally the most talkative person I’ve ever met and he likes to make the people surrounding him comfortable and laugh.”
“I met Tracey, my wife, in the summer of 2014. I am a native of Arizona and my wife is from North Yorkshire. Tracey moved to the US on a K1 fiancée visa after dating long distance for nearly two years. We were married May 28, 2016. As a married lesbian couple, we find people can be surprised or confused by our relationship. Rarely are people unkind. What I love most about Tracey is her optimism, English charm, and calm demeanor.”
“We met through my uni friend, we are together almost 2 years and unfortunately despite lots of friends supporting us, I have faced my own mother’s disapproval of this relationship. Fortunately, my girlfriend’s parents and my dad are supportive so I hope that it will just pass after some time.? Oh, and the best thing about Leona is her honesty – If nobody wants to tell me the truth I can always expect it from her. And that’s what I love about her ?”
“My girlfriend Naisha and I have known each other for 5 years and have been dating for 4 years. We met through her cousin who I was going to school with. We have faced discrimination online as we are public about being a cis-trans couple on our YouTube channels. When we first met I identified as a lesbian. After we had been dating for a few months I started to tell her about how I felt like a boy but I didn’t know what that meant. She came across the show I am Jazz and asked me if that was how I felt and I said YES!! She educated herself and quickly adapted to my new pronouns and my new name. I am eternally grateful for how she handled things.
Her loving and kind heart is what I love best about her! She also has encouraged me to create a YouTube channel in which we give back to the LGBTQ community by giving advice, tips, and support to anyone in need.”
“Me and my girlfriend met at college about a year and five months ago, we are doing the same two-year course and are in the same class. We’ve been together almost three months but we did like each other for a long while before we started dating.
We haven’t faced a lot of discrimination towards our relationship however, I personally still feel uncomfortable holding hands or kissing in public.
The best thing about my girlfriend is that we have so much in common, we love the same things. Her hair is so pretty, she makes me so happy and I love being with her.”
“I met my girlfriend at a coffee shop at the beginning of my first year of university. It was at a freshers event organised by the LGBTQ+ society at UoM where people in the community could meet other people in the society and new members could make friends. She asked me on a date two days later when we were on a freshers night out and 1 year and 4 months later here we are.
With regards to any discrimination that we have faced, we have been shouted at in the street and have had strangers approach us in bars asking inappropriate questions but nothing more than that as, fortunately, we have both got supportive families and friends. Our personalities compliment one another, she grounds me and I feel incredibly lucky to be able to spend my time with such a wonderful human.”
Do you see it yet?
These amazing couples (which I want to say a special thank you to for sharing their relationships with us) are all in love. They have found their special someone & are happily in a relationship… just like straight people.
For nearly all of our submissions to state that they have faced some sort of discrimination… this isn’t a coincidence. This is the reality of the ONLY difference between LGBTQ+ relationships & straight ones.
As one of our followers stated:
“Society’s reactions are different. Heterosexual, cisgender couples don’t have to deal with hatred and slurs as much as LGB+ couples” – @im_gay_get_it_straight
We are no different, our love is no less or more. The only thing that makes our relationships different is the society we live in. For me, this has put a lot of things into perspective.
And it upsets me to see the majority of our submissions experience different forms of homophobia… it’s meant to be 2018? LGBTQ+ relationships are no different, we are human beings. Let us love without discrimination & judgement.
I want to add, I’m not denying that straight relationships don’t face disapproving parents, having comments made about them. But if I took the same amount of people randomly, the negative results wouldn’t be all of the submissions.
So, there we have it.
The only difference between us and straight relationships, is acceptance. Sucks, right?