5 Annoying things you hear as a lesbian 🙄

All sexualities have certain stigma’s attached to them, which 9/10 are almost ridiculous. But this week, we have looked at the most ridiculous stereotypes attached with being a lesbian.

Identifying as lesbian means that you are attracted to females & to many peoples surprise… only females. When talking to others about how you identify as lesbian, you hear many offensive and derogatory terms thrown around, this could be by ‘accident’ and due to the fact that the individual is quite naive to what they are saying.

Either way, stereotyping of lesbians still goes on to this day.

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 You see someone with a short haircut? Lesbian

She’s wearing flannel? Lesbian

Why doesn’t she have her fingernails done? Lesbian

So, what are the most ridiculous stereotypes we’ve ever heard? Stick around to find out!

‘But you’re too pretty to be gay’

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So… these days appearance is everything. It’s the first thing someone judges and from that, they form an opinion on who you are.

Everyone in their head has a picture of a ‘stereotypical’ lesbian, but this image of what a lesbian should look like is out dated & ridiculous. We see many lesbians get labeled due to how they look, if we dress too masculine we are considered to be ‘butch’ or ‘dykey’ but if we dress too feminine we are ‘too pretty to be gay’… we can’t win.

Weirdly though, clothing/appearances do NOT determine your sexuality. These items are a way of self-expression or simply because they are comfy to wear.

If I’m too pretty to be gay, then god damn I must be pretty hot.

‘You just haven’t been with the right guy yet.’

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I loveeeeeeeeeeeee this one. There is always ONE guy who thinks his dick game is amazing & can cure us of our gayness.

The thing is guys, lesbians are lesbians for one reason… girls. We LOVE girls, just like you do. The fact you think you can change us back or show us the path of straightness is ridiculous & makes you even more repulsive.

Another key point to make, is that some lesbians have been with guys previously, others haven’t. Either way, we are certain of our sexuality & having a relationship with a guy, isn’t something on our agenda.

‘Who’s the man in the relationship?’

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… Yeah. Whenever I hear this, I’m left speechless. So, a little insight into what identifying as a lesbian means, because it’s not that obvious it seems!

Identifying as a lesbian means you are solely attracted to women. It means that any relationship you will encounter will be with a woman, hence being a lesbian. So, to put it bluntly. There is no man or a man equivalent, as we are women looking for a relationship with a woman.

Nowwwwwww… we always have that idiot in the background shouting about dildo’s, we hear you. Just because we are lesbians, does not change what we prefer sexually. We all have preferences, no matter our sexuality.

‘All lesbians are feminists & hate men’

FACT: When I came out as a lesbian, we had to sign a form which is a pact all of us lesbians sign saying we hate men.

The reason why we may be looked upon as feminists is probably solely  because we are with another woman. This is not the case though, our sexuality doesn’t determine our political views.

Majority want equality for ALL genders, not just for women. Being a lesbian means we don’t have to ‘rely’ on men, which for years women have prominently done. But this is no longer the case & women can live a full & loving life with another woman. We support equal rights because equality is a need, not only for women but for all genders as well.

But labelling all lesbians as feminists is ridiculous, as some may not agree. Again, it’s all down to personal choice.

Oh & FYI. We don’t hate men. That’s plain stupid.

‘All lesbians are the same’

For some reason, unknown to me. Sexuality categorises us all into one box, so because we are gay, straight, lesbian, bi and so on we all share the similar characteristics. We aren’t looked upon as individuals, we are judged on our sexuality.

However wrong this is, it happens. When I came out, so many people said to me ‘Oh I never knew, you’ve surprised me there’ & why have I surprised them? Because I don’t share similar characteristics with stereotypical lesbians.

I didn’t show them any warning signs of the flaming homo I am, which catches them off guard. But the thing is, no matter the sexuality, we are all unique individuals. Our sexuality doesn’t change our personality & it doesn’t all of a sudden make us into the stereotypical lesbian.


So yes, being a lesbian isn’t all as fun & games as you think. We haven’t even mentioned the stress of two hormonal girls at a certain time of the month…it’s a absoluteeeeeeee NIGHTMARE.

Why do we do it? 

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There are many stereotypes out there & we’ve all had different experiences. On our Instagram we are having a discussion about all the different stereotypes out there, if you want to share your thoughts on what has been stated here or on our Instagram, join in!

Join in the chat


Message from the Unite Team: We are so happy with the recent growth with our blog & we want to say a special thank you to those supporting us. We have a lot of exciting things in the pipeline that we hope will benefit everyone. Thank you everyone!

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Stop Sexualizing my Sexuality

7 Most Annoying Things You Hear When Identifying In The LGBTQ Community

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