My name is Bobby and I’m 29 years old from Virginia, USA. My story is a little different because I was a bit older when I started my transition. When I started my transition, I was married and had two kids. That’s what makes me able to tell my story from a different type of view.
When I finally found my true self to be the man I have always wanted to be, I was just turning 27. I was already living my life on my own, was with my wife for eight years and had two beautiful kids that were 10 and 15. It was a tough decision for me to go ahead with my transition because not only was I going to effect my life but it was going to effect theirs as well. This was not a decision I entered lightly.
I first sat down with my wife and talked with her about my decision in transitioning. My wife was completely supportive in my decision and to this day she still continues to support me. From doctors visits, to my T shots, to upcoming surgeries, she has been on board since day one.
After her and I sat down and talked, we decided it was time to tell our children. We talked to our daughter together because she was a bit younger. We explained to her that I didn’t feel comfortable in the body that I was in and I would be transitioning into a male. We also explained that I would be using male pronouns and that my new name would be Bobby. She didn’t really say much, but gave us a reaction to where we felt like she already saw me as the person I wanted to be. Almost like she’s been treating me like that already, why is this even a conversation?
After we spoke with her, I spoke to our son on my own. I remember driving in the car with him and I told him I wanted to talk to him about something important. I told him pretty much the same thing I said to my daughter. I remember his initial reaction so vividly because it was the epitome of a teenagers reaction. He looked at me said “ok cool” and went back to texting and listening to music. I sat there and didn’t really know what to say. After about five minutes, he took his headphones out and told me that if that’s what makes me happy then that’s all that mattered.
I tell this story because so many people think that it’s going to tear kids apart and turn their lives upside down by changing a couple of pronouns and explaining to them that someone will be going through a transition. It won’t. Kids are so resilient and responsive it’s unbelievable. More so than adults. They are more accepting in that manner. I love that my kids are so accepting of my transition and love me unconditionally. They love me regardless and it makes me super proud to be their dad.